Day 47 – At the End of Our Exploring

“When we live our lives authentically, we discover our true place in the world for the first time…the real fear, the one that sends shivers up our spines: the fear of succeeding, of becoming our authentic selves and facing the changes that will inevitably bring. We might not be happy with the way we are living now, but at least it’s safely familiar…At moments like this, it is comforting to consider T.S Eliot’s belief that there is really nothing to fear from self-awareness because at the end of all our personal exploration, we will arrive back where we started and know in our hearts that we finally belong here…we need to slay the dragons in our minds the same way…Today, if you feel frightened or unsure about the future, pick up the double-edged sword of Light and Love. Always remember, it’s simply not an adventure worth telling if there aren’t any dragons. But as in the best old tails, at the end of your exploring, you will live happily ever after.”

I am a glimmer of hope kind of gal. Like I’ve said. My glass is half full. Always. Even during the darkest times.

This is one of those posts, where I wish I had given myself the space yesterday to get my writing done. So that I can do this last post with the mental space from not having to do so many at once.

I’m exhausted after the Day 45 post. I think I finally acknowledged something in writing that has been bothering me. Something that I haven’t been able to verbalize…or write about. or acknowledge.

I need the space to think about it. I know that it will all be all right in the end. Am I the dragon that needed to be slayed here…? One of my fears is that a broken version of myself – one that didn’t have the ability to explore this happiness…or healthiness….causes anguish to others. But I am fully able to admit and recognize, I was probably the dragon. But I know I am not that dragon any more. The dragon is gone….because the dragon existed a previous life…a previous mindset…and she didn’t get the invitation to move forward. She couldn’t. She was slayed by my authentic self.


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